Disclaimer

On January 1, 2009, I started an experiment to write one new joke every day for at least one year. As 2009 rolled forward, the universe proceeded to deal me a series of events that left me with no lack of inspiration for new material. Most of these jokes have found their way into my on-stage routine, and most of them have become staples of my act.

Now that I have made it through my first year, my focus has shifted from quantity to quality. I still update with new jokes, just not on my original every frickin' day deadline. Please feel free to grade these jokes, and heckle them. If a joke gets heckled enough, I will go back and make them better. I want to make sure my audience gets their money's worth, even though this is a free service.

Tuesday, June 9

Be nice... or else

I've always wanted to train a squad of ninjas. Their purpose would be to enforce common courtesy. 20 items in the 10 items or less line? Prepare to get wailed on with nunchucks. Cut me off in traffic? Try explaining to your insurance company why there are throwing stars in all four tires. Admit it, that one guy in the movie theater talking loudly on his cell phone deserves an elegant thrashing by expertly trained warriors.
© 2009, Dan
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