Disclaimer

On January 1, 2009, I started an experiment to write one new joke every day for at least one year. As 2009 rolled forward, the universe proceeded to deal me a series of events that left me with no lack of inspiration for new material. Most of these jokes have found their way into my on-stage routine, and most of them have become staples of my act.

Now that I have made it through my first year, my focus has shifted from quantity to quality. I still update with new jokes, just not on my original every frickin' day deadline. Please feel free to grade these jokes, and heckle them. If a joke gets heckled enough, I will go back and make them better. I want to make sure my audience gets their money's worth, even though this is a free service.

Monday, August 10

Take that H.G. Wells!

One thing that always bugs me about time travel stories is that they never address the fact that it always involves warping space as well. Every time traveler seems to arrive in the same location as they were when they engaged the time machine, completely ignoring the fact that the Earth, the galaxy, and the entire universe has shifted. They could suffocate in the vacuum of space, get hit with a comet or materialize in the center of a star, and all they're worried about are preventing assassinations, not stepping on butterflies or their parents never meeting! Crazy scientists can be so self-centered.
© 2009, Dan
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