Disclaimer

On January 1, 2009, I started an experiment to write one new joke every day for at least one year. As 2009 rolled forward, the universe proceeded to deal me a series of events that left me with no lack of inspiration for new material. Most of these jokes have found their way into my on-stage routine, and most of them have become staples of my act.

Now that I have made it through my first year, my focus has shifted from quantity to quality. I still update with new jokes, just not on my original every frickin' day deadline. Please feel free to grade these jokes, and heckle them. If a joke gets heckled enough, I will go back and make them better. I want to make sure my audience gets their money's worth, even though this is a free service.

Wednesday, February 25

This show brought to you by the letters F and U

One thing I always loved about my grandmother was her affinity for home remedies. Particularly, her homemade cough medicine, which consisted of rock candy dissolved in Jack Daniels. It worked like a charm. The only downside was being a five-year-old with a hangover. "No Fruit Loops for me... Just black coffee, please. And could you turn off Sesame Street? Grover's about to drive me mad with that near-far-near-far bullshit."
© 2009, Dan
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