On January 1, 2009, I started an experiment to write one new joke every day for at least one year. As 2009 rolled forward, the universe proceeded to deal me a series of events that left me with no lack of inspiration for new material. Most of these jokes have found their way into my on-stage routine, and most of them have become staples of my act.

Now that I have made it through my first year, my focus has shifted from quantity to quality. I still update with new jokes, just not on my original every frickin' day deadline. Please feel free to grade these jokes, and heckle them. If a joke gets heckled enough, I will go back and make them better. I want to make sure my audience gets their money's worth, even though this is a free service.

Tuesday, December 15

She makes me want to renounce Carbon

I've come to a realization about Ann Coulter: Forget political ideology, forget my theory that she is the spawn of Skeletor and Secretariat, forget my bitter jealousy over the size of her Adam's apple... Whenever she speaks, no matter the subject matter, she manages to offend me on a molecular level.

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